Hello Mr. Williams,
I wanted to know if you felt majoring in African-American studies was worth it? I have always wanted to know more about my history and where I came from; however, my family tells me that having that major would be a waste of money. Do you believe that majoring in that was the right choice, and if so, what advice would you give someone who wants to do so as well?
Thank you for your time.
The worst thing about being an outgoing, creative person is the constant feeling of being alone. I’ve spent majority of my life believing that I did not have friends, and I still struggle with my expectations. I’ve spent majority of my life in a cycle, as well. I was always the person who called someone once a week, or went out of their way to check on someone, or sent a text message to remind someone I was still there. And more often than not, the persons I would be writing would screen my calls, ignore my texts, and disregard how desperately I was craving their friendship. I normally blame people’s allusiveness on a quality of mine: I am too loud, I am too rude, I am too goofy, I am too confident, I am too much.
Recently, in the last 3 years or so, I’ve been working really hard on becoming a better person. On owning my loudness, my rudeness, my humor, my confidence, myself. This small growth has allowed for my life to be so much better in terms of opportunities and networking. However, I still continue to struggle to find friendships that last past a surface level. I still cannot find someone who I can call when I am emotional - let alone someone who will answer. But I have to start holding myself accountable for the people I let into my life. I cannot keep chasing friendships that do not want to stay. And by starting this new step in my life, this detoxing of people who cannot support me the way I need to be supported, I can hope that I will grow from here.
I am always afraid.
i will use this transitioning time in my life to become better, disciplined, and focused.
but. but.. but… we ain’t sleepin tho.